Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Just an ordinary boy but he was looking to the sky ♥

So, today while I was thinking about today's post it hit me that I've been talking about love a lot and I haven't introduced you to the love of my life, he's the sweetest boy you could ever meet :) I love him soo much! He's like the cheese to my macaroni, the pop to my tart, the rock to my star and the peanut butter to my jelly ♥! He's my angel n.n Whenever I'm sad he's always there, and I love to kiss him and hug him.
He's like the most handome boy ever :D and I mean that ;D. He's just like... the person that makes me wanna fight everyday for a better world, he's my reason, my all. Can you tell how much I love him? Hahaha I suppose you can. Seriously, if you could meet him, you'd fall for his charm also, he's a don juan, totally :D hahaha but omg he's just sooo cute!! Well well well, I just talk and talk about him and you don't even know him! Well, let me introduce you to Juan Carlos, he's my little brother who has Down Syndrome, and he's the spark in my life n.n:



Didn't I tell you he was the cutest? n.n

_____________________________________________
Hello, I love you ♥

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Love

Feeling like there's a revolution inside you.
Being crazy and blind and a little obsessed.
Creating a perfect world around someone else.
Losing your head.
Attacking your logic with emotions.
A wave of peace surrounded by chaos.
A sweet melody you always like to sing.
An angel's lullaby.
Chaos beautifully arranged.
A combination of everything and nothing that leaves you feeling just right.
Being possesed by an undescribable feeling.
Singing and dancing when there's no music.
Seeing the bright side all the time.
Watching that someone for hours at a time and never growing tired of it.
Giving up yourself to make space for someone else.
Adding a new special date on the calendar.
Spending your time thinking of ways to make that someone feel special.
Planning your whole weekend according to someone else's desires.
Growing insane for someone.
Starting to believe in fate, in things you used to call stupid.
Making a fool of yourself just to make someone smile.
Telling bad jokes just cuz you can.
Planning romantic, cheesy stuff.
Wearing that awful outfit just cuz somebody likes it.
Like a ray of sunshine that brightens your life.
A forever.
An always.
A chance.
A hope.
Something that keeps you wishing.
Happiness.
An appointment with destiny.
A life saver.
A permanent seasick feeling that you adore.
A drunkness you wish would stay forever.
A rooting that lets you fly.
A contradiction.
A beautiful disaster.
Electricity running through your veins everytime you see that someone.
A shudder you feel when you hear that someone's voice.
Being lost in someone's eyes.
Staring blankly at space because life has never been so beautiful.
A choice.
A decision.
An option.
A mist of air that awakens the soul.
A chunk of ice that makes you shiver.
A hot coal that burns.
A delicacy.

A thing that cannot be described, you can try, but words can only get you so far.
____________________________________
Love's what keeps me spinning around and what roots me down to the earth, all at the same time, cuz that's what love is. A contradiction. A damn beautiful contradiction.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

I wish I was your favorite girl.

You look so sweet sitting down with legs crossed, your face is staring at nowhere, just blankly looking through the space, your eyes are lost in a dream, and your hair is floating. Your lips quiver a bit and your hands are at your side drumming as always. You hold your BlacBerry like it's some treasure and then you suddenly wake up from your hypnosis and look me in the eye and smile. You turn your head upward and look to the sky, y0u let the rays of sun bathe you and it's like they bring you to life. Your skin ever so soft enlightens with the sunlight and I have to battle with the urge of hugging you. I turn away and you turn to look at me, as if you could read my mind, you give me your puppy eyes and your look turns gloomy as you ask: "Hey, what's up? Something wrong?" And I smile because it melts me everytime you worry about me and I just shake my head and you smile back and tilt your head backwards again, absorbing as much sun as you can. You start singing and you drift away again. In my mind I'm silently hugging you and telling you how much I love you, and how much I wish you'd always be like this. Happy.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Love's the solution.

He asked:
What's your solution?
Hate, envy, solitude, suicide, depression, selfishness, heartbreak, pain, rejection, war, perfectionism, anorexia, bulimia, self-hatred, pride, low self-steem.

She answered:
Hope, peace, faith... Love.

He said:
You can't fix everything with love.

She answered:
Not everything, everyone.

He said:
Love's stupid.

She said:
No it's not, it can change the world if we'd only let it.

He said:
Oh really? Name one, just one person who was changed by love.

She said:
Me.

_______________________________
The truth is love is all we need.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Diane

Dear Diane,

I miss you. I miss our sundaes, I miss your laugh, I miss the way you used to comb my hair and how you'd always listen to me, wether it was a stupid complain or a question I had. I miss your sweet voice, sometimes I even think I hear you, talking to me, but when I turn around your voice fades in the wind, and I let a tear escape my eyes. I know you told me to be strong and not to cry, but it's just too much to ask, it's already been three years and the pain's still here. It pierces through my soul eveytime I see your room with all your stuff, everytime I walk past a couple of girls chatting and laughing, thinking that should've been us. I know you always told me not to wonder too much, and not to regret things but I do, I regret not being with you when you passed away, I regret not holding your hand and kissing you goodbye, I regret all the time I wasted, because I never knew what a precious gift you were until I was about to lose you. I even remember I prayed, I said: God, okay I learnt my lesson, I'll learn to appreciate things more, so you can stop now, you can let her live, but still... you died. I was so angry, and so hurt, and I still am... I love you Diane, and I'll never ever forget you, I'll take you along in my heart forever.

yours,
me.

My sister died when I was twelve, and life was never quite the same after that. When she was alive, we'd play hide and seek, we'd sing Britney Spears to the top of our lungs while driving in her car, we'd talk about everything and we'd go get sundaes every sunday. I remember my mom would make brownies once a month on our "family day", it was the last saturday of every month and we'd sit in the living room and play UNO, or just random board games, we'd talk about everything and we would all cook dinner together while my mom baked the brownies. It was awesome. She was awesome. She was very beautiful too, I'd love to sit on her bed and watch her comb her long hair, and then she'd turn around and motion me to go with her and she'd comb mine.
"Your hair is so pretty, Diane, when will mine be like that?"
"Honey, I have straight hair, and yours is curly, it's different types of hair," she'd say with a smile.
"But that ain't fair, I want straight hair also."
"Don't say that!"
"Why not?"
"Cuz I wish I had curly hair like yours, it's so beautiful, when you grow up you'll see how boys chase after you because of your hair, mark my words."
She had hazel eyes and she was tall and slim, she was perfect, and she was my best friend.
She was the one I'd run to everytime I had a nightmare, I'd go to her bedroom crying and she'd make place for me in her bed. I always loved her bed, it smelled of her and had all of her pretty pillows with little jewels sewn. I remember she'd soothe me and sing me to sleep, I did this until I turned eleven and my mom told me I was too old for being baby-ed by my sister. I wish I would've continued doing it.
I wish... I wish she'd be here with me, I wish I could run to her everytime our parents fought, now I have to settle with going to her room and shutting the door while I hide under her covers, trying to find her scent. I wish I could tell her about Ronnie, and how he's crazy about my curly hair, I wish she would've been here to explain things to me when I got my first period. It was such a lonely time then, it had been four months since she had died and my mom wasn't quite herself yet, well, she still isn't. It's funny how people change, how families that are struck by tragedy can suddenly become so fragile.
My family isn't what it used to be, my mom has never gotten near brownies again, my dad's absent so much time that sometimes I wonder if he still lives with us, there were never more "family days". No more sundaes, no more movies, no more anything. And me? I live like a ghost, never really here, never really anywhere else. I know that I'll always miss my sister, and I know that my heart will never be truly whole again, because she took a part of me when she died. I just wish she would've let me tag along when she left the earth.
Dont misunderstand me, I dont want to die, I just wish that wherever my sister is... I'd be with her.

______________________________
Just so you know, this is all fictional :)

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

The girl in deep blue converse.

So, starting today, I intend to write for a week, everyday. I'll write about anything and everything, I hope I can achieve my goal since I always forget about my blog for such a long time, but well, we'll see how it goes, I'll start today:

So today I was in the ATS waiting for my friend's sister to get out of school while I was listening to Sean Paul in my iPod, but then other groups started coming out, and I decided I'd quit the music and look around, not because I knew anyone but simply because I like to observe, I like to watch people and how they act, how they dress... basically I like to watch people, period. So I watched the little kids wandering about and trying to figure out who could jump higher. Then the high school students started coming out and I saw this girl who seemed to be in her own world. She was wearing torn jeans, deep blue converse and a white t-shirt with some print I couldn't see, her hair was down and she was looking about, just like I was. No, I wasn't stalking her, she just seemed... interesting. It was the kind of girl who wouldn't care about your opinion on her looks, who would write things down (like me) and not care if anyone ever reads it, or if anyone ever even likes it. She started walking down the path, and I noticed she was wearing a lot of bracelets in her right hand, they were pretty cool, and that's were my mind went off. My imagination started knitting together her looks, her bracelets and all of her made-up personality. I imagined her to be a rebel, not the yelling, stubborn type of rebel, but more like the quiet one that stands her ground all the time. I started imagining her in different scenarios, until I got to one I liked best and told my imagination to let me wander in that scene.
In the scene she was dressed in white while wearing her deep blue converse, her hair was down and she wore no make-up. Her hands were free of bracelets and there was another girl with her, and she walked up to her and hugged her, the girl in reply stretched her arm and opened her hand, there was a locket inside, she gave it to the girl in deep blue converse and she started crying, and suddenly, the wind carried her away, not like a balloon, but more like a bunch of petals that are blown swiftly across the fields by the wind, she just faded. But you could see her colors being carried by the wind. As soon as the girl in deep blue converse was about to say something, someone knocked on the window and I opened my eyes, not knowing I had even closed them. It was my friend's sister. She got inside the car and we left. I tried to search for the girl but didn't see her anymore. I decided to forget about it and turned off my imagination as I drifted away looking at the road as Miguel (the driver) took me home. No more wild dreams, at least for today.
_____________________________________

Love might not get you around the world, but it'll take you to the stars, where will hate take you, huh?
 

Blog Template by YummyLolly.com - Header Frame by Pixels and Ice Cream
Sponsored by Free Web Space